Why Plot Bunnies Should Go and Jump Off a Bridge
by kitkat411
Summary: A series of little ficlets, products of my imagination and a fic table. Pairings, yes, but subtle. NINE chapters up. Yes, NINE!More to follow, of course! Some are romantic, others are angsty, and some are just pure crack. Sort of unclassifiable. R and R
1. Beginnings

Why Plot Bunnies Should Go and Jump Off a Bridge

By: KitKat411

**Author's Notes: I don't know how I get myself into these situations. I really don't know. However, I was bored with my Physics final, and I was on my LiveJournal account, looking for plot bunnies. Lo and behold, I saw something called a "Fic Table." Apparently, these are one hundred one-word prompts to write about. Being the bored moronic idiot that I am, I'm going to try this. I probably, no definitely, will not get to one hundred, but this should amuse my ADD enough for now. **

**Don't worry, I'll still update "To Catch a Killer," but these random ficlets sound adorably promising. **

**So here comes the first plot bunny: "Beginnings." This has some-oh, what's the word?-shoren-ai? In it, and is my first attempt at a slight L/Light "pairing." I dunno, but these two are so cute together, and since everyone's writing about it…why can't I?**

**All right, so the plot bunnies should go and jump off a bridge. Now I will, too.**

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Beginnings

Light Yagami opened his eyes as the first sign of sunlight fell across the room. The metal chains rustled annoyingly, but the bed sheets muffled the noise almost completely.

Light was about to get up when he realized what was wrong about his present situation: There wasn't any noise. There were no bothersome taps from the laptop or whirring noises from the monitoring tapes. In fact, the room was as silent as the grave. Light took a moment to appreciate the silence, and then wondered what was causing it. Why couldn't he hear anything?

Light turned over in the bed and smiled at the sight before him. The chains again rustled in the bed, but not enough to wake the apparently asleep detective beside Light. L was curled into his customary ball, his thumb in his mouth and his chest slowing rising and falling.

Light marveled at the sight. He had no idea this insomniac _ever_ slept, and now, here he was, watching the former insomniac sleep. Light smiled, wondering what the detective was dreaming about. Cake? Catching Kira? Pie?

L stirred slightly, and Light closed his eyes tightly, pretending to be asleep. He opened them a few moments later; however, as he realized the boy was not yet awake. He was simply talking to himself. Light leaned closer to L, trying to hear what he was saying.

"_Raito-kun…"_

Light jerked back slightly, causing the chains to clang loudly. Ryuuzaki-L-was dreaming about _him_? Light smiled softly and stroked the detective's raven hair.

Closing his eyes again, Light snuggled back under the covers. He turned his body toward L's and moved so close to him that they were touching.

Originally, Light thought that being chained to L would bring nothing but misery.

Now, however, it was looking to be a new beginning for the both of them.


	2. Middles

Why Plot Bunnies Should Go and Jump Off a Bridge

By: KitKat411

**Author's Notes: Huzzah! She continues! More plot bunnies and word prompts! Haha. Sarcasm is fun.**

**Anywho, Part Two! Wahoo! More OOC, drabbles! Only this one's even better: I'm writing this at 12:20 A.M.! **

**Oh, and when I say "one-OH-clock" instead of "one-o-clock," I'm making fun of whomever says that. It isn't a grammar error, don't worry. Hee hee hee.**

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Middles

"Light! Misa-Misa can't believe it! Light wants to go out on a date with Misa-Misa?!?!?!?!?"

Light Yagami moved the phone, to which the overly cheery girl was screaming into, away from his ear and grimaced. Yes, he realized the importance of keeping Misa-Misa around. She was the only one who possessed the Shinigami eyes, an extremely useful tool in creating his utopia. But did the Second Kira _really_ have to be such an idiot?

But Light did not voice these feelings aloud, lest Misa decide to write a certain someone's name in her Death Note.

And by "certain someone," Light meant, "Light Yagami."

And so Light swallowed his disgust and said, "Yes, Misa. I would like nothing better than go out with you. But _not_ as a date, per se. I simply am getting a cup of coffee, and I would like you to be there as well. How's tomorrow, around one? WE can go to the café near the investigation center."

"Misa-Misa would LOVE to go to any coffee shop Light wanted, and at any time! She will be there at exactly one! Not one-oh-one! ONE-OH-CLOCK!"

Light, instead of replying, hung up the phone. Tomorrow was not going to be fun. In fact, this "date" with Misa would be even less "fun" than being accused of being Kira.

Yes, it was going to be that bad. He could just tell.

The Next Day:

At "Killer's Café" 

Misa hated lying to her one true love, but appeared at the café not at one, as promised, but at twelve-thirty. She had stayed up half the night finding the perfect outfit for Light, and had on said outfit now. She and Rem-although, to be honest, Rem didn't do very much-had ransacked Misa's closet, trying on hundreds of combinations of clothes.

Misa looked around the café excitedly, waiting for Light to arrive. He NEVER asked Misa out on a date, and she didn't want him to stand her up!

After a few moments, Misa saw Light sitting in the back corner of the café. His back was to her, but Misa could recognize his pretty hair anywhere. Misa ran over to him, eagerly awaiting the kiss Light was sure to give her.

"LIGHT!!!!!" Misa cried excitedly. "Misa-Misa is so happy to see her Light! Misa-chan can't believe you asked her out, Light! Misa can't believe…RYUUZAKI??!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!??!?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE ON MISA'S DATE?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!??!"

Ryuuzaki stared up at her through his giant black-and-white eyes. Misa tried not to shudder. She always tried to be as nice as possible, but everything about this boy-his appearance, his sitting position, his addition to sugar-frightened her.

"Misa," Ryuuzaki said, "I apologize for this inconvenience. However, I do have a reasonable excuse, or, failing that, an explanation."

Misa didn't understand half of what Ryuuzaki was telling her, so she decided to ask her question again. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE ON MISA'S DATE?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!!"

Ryuuzaki took his hand out of his mouth and showed Misa the handcuff encircling his wrist. "I couldn't leave Kira and the Second Kira alone together. The chances of you plotting a mass killing spree would be thirty-five percent." He stuck his thumb back in his mouth and stared at the ceiling. "Plus, I lost the key to unlock us." He added this as an afterthought.

Light was watching this little exchange, and couldn't say he didn't like it. Being chained to a man who constantly accused him of being Kira was irritating at best, yes. However, the prospect of being on a date, _alone_, with Misa was far scarier.

And so, instead of standing up for Misa, he smiled at her. "Would you like to sit down, Misa?" He asked her, pulling up a chair. "I think there is room between Ryuuzaki and myself, if you want."

Misa sat down in between the two boys. She stared at Light, love in her eyes, and then glared at the idiot who was trying to keep them apart. Stupid Ryuuzaki.

And with this thought, Misa folded her arms across her chest and sulked. Being in the middle was no fun.

No fun _at all_.


	3. Birthdays

Why Plot Bunnies Should Go and Jump off a Bridge

By: KitKat411

**Author's Notes: Meh. There isn't really anything going on in my life to rant about. Ya'll lucked out. If, however, this story MIGHT seem a little familiar. However, this is only familiar if you happen to be one of my-cough MANY cough- stalkers. Hee hee hee. **

**No, I don't have stalkers. I wish I did, though. Especially if they were male. And hot. **

**BUT ANYWAY! MOVING ON! This is prompt 91, and it's bittersweet. Ah, and spoliers for L's real name. There might be a sprinkling of OOCness, but the stats are correct. Oh, and yes, I'm going out of order. However, this one was too cute to resist. So, without further ado…**

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Prompt Ninety-One: Birthdays

It was a cold and rainy day outside, but the inside of the Kira Investigation Headquarters was bright, cheery, and filled with warmth. For at least five days out of the year, this building was filled with life, instead of bedraggled, frustrated policemen.

And February 28th was one of the days that was filled with joy and happiness.

"Happy birthday to Light! Happy birthday to youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!"

"Blow out your candles, Light! Make a wish!"

Light Yagami sat on the couch in the investigation room and tried not to smile _too_ broadly. This was one of the nicer days of the year, really. He had presents, Misa was bothering someone else, and he didn't have to pretend to hunt for Kira. He even had his own birthday cake to enjoy! He knew this was a foolish thought, however- he knew all too well that Ryuuzaki would soon be devouring his birthday cake.

Well, at least Ryuuzaki couldn't accuse him of being Kira. It was his _birthday_, damn it.

"Raito-kun, the chances of you being Kira will increase to thirteen percent if you do not blow out your candles."

Or, you know, not. Apparently, Ryuuzaki could accuse him of being Kira any day, at any time, or at any moment. _Damn detective, _Light thought_. KIRADAMN him._

Light screwed up his face in concentration and made a wish. _I wish that, for one day, Ryuuzaki would shut up about me being Kira._ Then he blew out the candles with the force of a hurricane. The candles surrendered immediately to Kira's wrath; they blew out instantaneously.

Light smirked at the candles, pleased with his accomplishment. He turned to his left and glared at the raven-haired boy next to him. _If only all of his problems could be eliminated so easily. _

Still, however, apart from Ryuuzaki eating _the entire cake_, Light's birthday was quite fun. He received many nice gifts-an expensive watch from his dad, a sweater set from the rest of the investigation team, and flowers and chocolate from Misa. Ryuuzaki, however, had given Light a rather peculiar gift, and, as the two of them lay in their bed that night, Light questioned his handcuffed friend.

"Ryuuzaki," Light asked, his hands folded behind his head, "why did you give me breath mints for my birthday?"

Ryuuzaki was curled in his ball and appeared to be concentrating on the bedspread very intently. Finally, he spoke. "Raito-kun, whenever I lean in to talk to you, your breath smells. For one who spends so much time on his appearance, I thought you would appreciate the mints. They're sugar-free, anyway."

Light gritted his teeth in annoyance. There were so many things that irked him about this last statement, but he chose to pursue the most aggravating of the insults. "Then why, Ryuuzaki, do you not simply lean in when talking to me?"

"That is how I talk to all people, Raito-kun. It isn't just you. I have always talked to people in that manner and I refuse to change now, no matter how much it irks you."

Light grabbed the pillow behind his head and screamed into it. This man, this idiot, this incompetent fool…How he pissed Light off!

After a moment of self-pity, however, Light came to a sudden realization. "Ryuuzaki," he asked, "when is _your_ birthday?"

Ryuuzaki looked up from the bedspread, slightly startled. "What, Raito-kun?"

"Your birthday, Ryuuzaki. When is it?"

Ryuuzaki frowned. "I'm not telling my birthday to a Kira suspect. However, it is sometime in the autumn."

"Oh." Light paused, and felt a feeling of guilt unwillingly was over him. "I'm sorry, Ryuuzaki. I didn't know about your birthday. Did you do anything special? Did you eat any nice sweets?"

Ryuuzaki looked at Light and scoffed. "Of course not, Ratio-kun." At Light's surprised face, Ryuuzaki continued. "My birthday nearly always goes unnoticed by everyone. It took even me a day or so to realize that my birthday had passed.

My birthdays are not celebrated here, or at any time in my life, to be honest. They are not victories, nor do they help me in my quest for Justice. Birthdays simply "celebrate" the fact that we have endured another three hundred and sixty five days on Earth. I do not find that to be a great accomplishment, nor does it aid us in the Kira investigation. So what is the point?"

Light looked down. "Still, though…my family would always celebrate my birthday."

Ryuuzaki nodded. "Yes, I thought they would. You and I have very dissimilar pasts, Raito-kun. Your family is "soft," "loving," and comfortable. Of course they would celebrate something as trivial as a birthday. My past, however, was quite different, Ratio-kun. I was raised in an atmosphere where birthdays were not a part of our lives."

Light stayed silent, absorbing this information. He had never a word of Ryuuzaki's past before now, and was now quite curious. He knew better then to pry, however, lest his chances of being Kira increased.

And so, with Light to afraid to ask any more questions and Ryuuzaki unwilling to talk more, then night passed silently. Light fell asleep around midnight and Ryuuzaki slept for approximately three hours, as per the norm.

When Ryuuzaki was awakened by the noises of Light Yagami taking a shower, however, he felt a very odd feeling. There was a seventy-three percent chance that there was something on him, or, more specifically, his mess of black hair. Ryuuzaki pulled the strange object off his head and stared at it. It was a small box, neatly wrapped, with a card attached to it. Glaring at the bathroom door, Ryuuzaki pulled open the card and read:

_Dear Ryuuzaki,_

_Happy birthday, even if it's a few months late._

_Your first friend,_

_Light Yagami_

Ryuuzaki stared at the card, unable to speak for a few moments. There was an odd sensation filling him, and it puzzled the young detective. There was a fifty-four percent chance Ryuuzaki could not be happy, and yet, here he was, defying the odds.

Ryuuzaki then surprised himself even further. He let out a small smile, placed the box gently on the pillow of his bed, tucked the card into the pocket of his jeans, and went over to the refrigerator. There, he pulled out a small chocolate cupcake with a single candle stuck in it. Ryuuzaki took out said candle and shoved the cake into his mouth in a single bite.

_Happy birthday to me…_

_Happy birthday to me…_

_Happy birthday, L Lawliet…_

_Happy birthday to me._


	4. Woods

Why Plot Bunnies Should Go and Jump off a Bridge

By: KitKat411

**Author's Notes: So…hola again, amigos! I'm going to Florida for a week, from June 12****th**** to the 19****th****. So, there won't be any updates for SEVEN DAYS. GASP. I'll still be writing them-hopefully-so I'll have lots of updates when I get back.**

**Anyway, the long and short of it is this: I present to you as many of these short things as I can write between now-Sunday night-and Tuesday. Me hopes you'll like them. And me hopes to get a TON of reviews in the week I'm not here.**

**So…strive for one thousand reviews, okay? Haha. Just kidding. But yeah, reviews, comments, criticism, all appreciated. Gracias. **

**And so…To Prompt Fifty. And yes, it's poorly-written crack. I love crack. Notice the last names of the characters. Plus, this stupid bunny wouldn't leave me alone. Refer to my title if you are confused as to my opinion about plot bunnies.**

**PS. Want to hear a secret? That last fic prompt, "Birthdays," made me cry too. Something about Ryuuzaki…abandoned every birthday he's ever known, yet he still saves one birthday candle…WAHH. Now I'm crying again.**

**NOW DO YOU SEE WHY I WRITE CRACK FICS???**

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Prompt Fifty: Woods

_Once upon a time, a little girl named Naibselami Kiara. She lived in a small house with her mother, her father, her brother, and her dog, Schnuk. Kiara was a very pretty girl; she spent many hours a day on her appearance, trying to create the "perfectly tousled" look in her brown hair. Also, Kiara was also in possession of a magnificent pen. She was known throughout the land for this, and was known as Little Brown Writing Head. She was also very intelligent, but was also a horribly stubborn and conceited person._

_One day, Kiara's mother asked Kiara to take a basket to Kiara's grandmother. After much grumbling on her part, Kiara finally agreed. She rudely grabbed the basket from her mother, called to Schnuk, and set off for her grandmother's house. Along the way, Kiara pulled out her notebook and doodled with her expensive pen. She wrote her name-KIARA- in large and elegant letters all over the notebook's pages._

_After a short while, however, Kiara was stopped suddenly by a large object. Looking to see what had blocked her from moving, Kiara was surprised to see a large panda in the middle of the path. It was, of course, a beautiful panda, one of the most beautiful pandas in the world. Kiara, however, blinked in utter astonishment and shook her head in surprise, but the panda remained there. Even stranger, as Kiara watched, the panda spoke to her._

_"Hello, Kiara," it said to her. "Where are you off to today?"_

_Kiara was _this close_ to screaming. First off, pandas should not speak. Second of all, how did this panda know her name???_

_"I'm taking a basket of sweets to my grandmother." Kiara said, too afraid not to reply._

_"Oh. I see." The panda leaned towards Kira and continued. "Would you like to play a game of tennis?"_

_"TENNIS?!?!?!?!?" Kiara screamed. "WITH A PANDA??!?!!?!?!?"_

_The panda looked down. "Then there is a sixty-fiver percent chance you would say no if I asked you again…" _

_"Damn right there is! I'm not playing tennis with a panda!"_

_The panda stayed silent, and then looked off into the distance. He wanted the sweets in the girl's basket. He was hungry! However, he had to find his way to this grandmother's house. And in order to beat Kiara there, he needed to distract her. But how?_

_After a moment, the panda spoke again. "Oh! Look over there, Kiara! Apples!" He cried, pointing at an apple tree. _

_Schnuk followed the panda's gaze and took off in search of the apples. Kiara followed the dog, calling for it to come back to her._

_The panda watched the happy couple, and then lumbered back to the grandmother's house. He entered the house, stuffed Granny in the closet, put on her clothes, crawled in a ball inside the bed, and waited for Kiara to arrive._

_And arrive Kiara did. She pounded on the door. "Granny!" She called cheerfully. "Granny, it's me, Kiara! Can I come in?"_

_The panda adjusted the bed's blankets before speaking. "Come in, sweetie." He said after completing this task. "And bring the sweets with you."_

_Kiara entered the house. She placed the basket on the kitchen table and went to greet her grandmother. However, she noticed something was wrong._

_"Granny!" She said, a little worried. "What large circles you have underneath your eyes!"_

_"The better to not sleep with, my dear." The panda replied._

_"What a white color your skin is, Granny!"_

_"The better to not catch skin cancer, my dear."_

_"What large eyes you have, Granny!"  
"The better to peer intently, intensely and awkwardly at you, my deer."_

_"What a strange way to lie down, Granny!"_

_"The better to keep my reasoning abilities up, my dear."_

_By this time, Kiara was severely freaked out. She asked the final question, afraid of the answer._

_"What big teeth you have, Granny!"  
The panda leered at her. "The better to eat sugar with, my dear. Or failing sugar, the better to eat _you_ with, my dear!" _

_And with that, the panda grabbed Kiara and ate her up. Then he ate the box of sweets. _

_And when the news of Kiara's demise spread throughout the land, the people cheered. After all Kiara was a mean, selfish bitch and no one liked her, anyway._

……………………………………………………………………………………

Ryuuzaki sat up suddenly, a thin layer of sweat covering his body. What the hell was that? He _never_ slept; he never had dreams. So what the hell was _that_?

Maybe Raito-kun was right, Ryuuzaki mused. Maybe he _should_ lay off the sugar before bedtime. It always gave him the strangest dreams.


	5. Sunsets

Why Plot Bunnies Should Go and Jump off a Bridge

By: KitKat411

**Author's Notes: So…hola again, amigos! I'm going to Florida for a week, from June 12****th**** to the 19****th****. So, there won't be any updates for SEVEN DAYS. GASP. I'll still be writing them-hopefully-so I'll have lots of updates when I get back.**

**Anyway, the long and short of it is this: I present to you as many of these short things as I can write between now-Sunday night-and Tuesday. Me hopes you'll like them. And me hopes to get a TON of reviews in the week I'm not here.**

**So…strive for one thousand reviews, okay? Haha. Just kidding. But yeah, reviews, comments, criticism, all appreciated. Gracias. **

**And so…To Prompt Thirty-Two. Another drabble. Not crack! Finally! I'm learning how to shorten these stupid things.**

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Prompt Thirty-Two: Sunsets

It was getting to be the time of day where the Kira team left. Shrugging on their coats, the men would leave after a long day of hard hunting and no results. Proud as they were to serve Ryuuzaki and catch Kira, the team was still always grateful to leave.

The teenage boy and the strange detective, however, stayed. They always stayed on the premises; they never left the building's high security's grounds. The strange detective did not mind the quarantine, as he had spent most of his life in front of a computer screen, anyway. The younger boy, kept here by six feet of metal, did not like their living situation. He had grown up outside and therefore enjoyed "the great outdoors."

Which is why the young man turned to the detective and asked, "Ryuuzaki, can we take a break and go outside?"

The older put his supersaturated tea down and stared at the younger boy. "Outside, Ratio-kun?"

"Yes, Ryuuzaki." The younger boy nodded vehemently to show the seriousness of this topic. "It's nearing the sunset, after all. The sunset is always so nice to look at."

Ryuuzaki paused, taking in this information. He had no interest in watching a medium-sized star move very slowly. However, if he could get Raito-kun to work harder as a result of this break, then maybe it would be worth it.

"All right, Ratio-kun. Let's go to the roof, then. There are cameras on the roof."

Light Yagami nodded, although still annoyed by the assumption that Ryuuzaki would need cameras to monitor his actions.

The two boys climbed the stairs and emerged on the roof. As promised, the star was sinking closer to the Earth's horizon, spreading beams of radiant colors across the sky. Ryuuzaki sat on the ground and curled into his ball. Light sat beside him and stared up at the sky.

"It's a beautiful sunset, Ryuuzaki." The younger boy remarked, staring at the other boy. "Don't you think?"

Ryuuzaki said nothing and Light continued to speak. "I have great respect for the sun," he said. "Every day, the sun rises in the east and sets in the west. There is never any deviation, no unpredictability to the sun.

The sun also gives light to the people. Without the sun, there would be nothing. Humans would cease to exist; life itself would stop. Without the sun, there would be nothingness.

And everyone knows this. Every human understands the power of the sun. No one doubts the sun; no one questions the sun's motives. There are religions solely devoted to the worship of the sun, Ryuuzaki. Everyone appreciates the sun. The sun is not hunted, or tried, or captured. The sun gives life. The sun, every morning, returns the earth to where it is supposed to be. It restores Justice to the world."

Light lay down on the roof's floor and placed his hands behind his head. He stared up at the sun. "I wouldn't mind being the sun." He remarked finally, after a moment of thought.

Ryuuzaki stuck his thumb in his mouth. "Watching the sunset is a waste of time, Raito-kun."

Light turned to stare at the detective. "What do you watch, then, Ryuuzaki?"

Ryuuzaki paused. "I suppose I appreciate the moon," he said. "The moon comes out in the night, after the sun. The moon is strong, silent, and unassuming. It does not brag about it's achievements as the sun does; no one stays outside to watch the moon set.

And yet, the moon is as powerful as the sun. The moon lights up the dark. It gives a beacon to hope to those who are lost. Sailors used the moon to travel by at night. The moon guided their way to freedom, to hope.

The moon shows us who we truly are, Light Yagami. During the day, when the sun is shining, people pretend to be something they are not. In the dark of night, where only the moon shines, however, it is impossible to hide. Once a month, werewolves change from human to wolf under the light of the moon. You cannot hide from the moon, no matter what the secret is. We discover who we are at night, under the moon's gaze. During the day we are separated into different "classes": the poor, the rich, the smart, the foolish. However, all of this changes at night. Everyone is equal in the dark."

And Ryuuzaki said nothing further, and neither did Light. However, the two boys stayed on that roof the entire night, watching the sun set in the east and the moon rise in the west.


	6. White

Why Plot Bunnies Should Go and Jump off a Bridge

By: KitKat411

**Author's Notes: So…hola again, amigos! I'm going to Florida for a week, from June 12****th**** to the 19****th****. So, there won't be any updates for SEVEN DAYS. GASP. I'll still be writing them-hopefully-so I'll have lots of updates when I get back.**

**Anyway, the long and short of it is this: I present to you as many of these short things as I can write between now-Sunday night-and Tuesday. Me hopes you'll like them. And me hopes to get a TON of reviews in the week I'm not here.**

**So…strive for one thousand reviews, okay? Haha. Just kidding. But yeah, reviews, comments, criticism, all appreciated. Gracias. **

**And so…To Prompt Nineteen. Another drabble. Spoilers for what I think is Near's real name. ((I'm not that far in the anime yet, you see.))**

**Finally! I'm learning how to shorten these stupid things.**

**PS. Prompt Twenty-Three is "Lovers." Any ideas? Post them in a review TODAY, JUNE 11, 2007!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OR ELSE, FOOLS. **

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Prompt Nineteen: White

It was a beautiful day outside. It was one of the few days in Britain without rain, without a single cloud in the sky. The children of Wammy's House took advantage of this rare opportunity; every single child was outside playing, basking in the glow of the warm summer's day.

If anyone had bothered to check inside, however, they would have discovered their assumptions to be false. Not _every_ child was outside. If anyone had bothered to check inside, they would have discovered a child inside. This child was staring out of a large bay window, an array of toys scattered around his bare feet. This boy was the newest boy to be admitted into Wammy's House and his name was Nate Rivers. However, at Wammy's House, this strange and quiet child was known simply as, "Near."

Near was indeed looking out the large window. He was watching the children play three stories below him. It was still his first week at this new school; he was homesick for his old life.

However, that was not the only reason for Near's avoidance of his peers. He was sure they did not like him very much, and so he stayed away. Near pressed his nose up to the glass, watching the happy children and remembering his first class at Wammy's House.

_A young teacher, probably around twenty-five or so, walked a small child down a large hallway. The boy, instead of being comforted by this gesture, was terrified. __**He felt as though he was being led to his execution**__. She held the young boy's hand and whispered lies in his ear._

"_It's going to all be okay," she told him. "You're here at Wammy's House; you're safe here."_

_The teacher stopped in front of a door marked, "The Ten-Year-Old Area." She pushed the door open and guided the small boy inside, shutting the door behind her._

"_Class?" The teacher called. Twenty pairs of eyes turned to the teacher, then immediately to the small boy beside her. "This is Near, the newest student to Wammy's House. Treat him with respect." The teacher smiled, pushed Near towards the other children, and left._

_**Ready the guns, men! **_

_The other children walked over to Near and stared at him with a curious interest. _

"_What kind of a name is 'Near,' anyway?" One of the children asked him._

_Near looked down at the ground, embarrassed. He never enjoyed being the center of attention. "I don't know what kind of name 'Near' is," he said to the ground. "That's the name they gave me when I came here."_

_"But 'Near' isn't even a real name!" Shouted another child. "It's a preposition!"_

_Near nodded. "I know."_

_The girl who had spoken first shook her head. "Did you really know, Near? Because you don't look very smart. This is a school for _gifted _children, haven't you heard? You have to be smart to be here. Are you sure you're at the right school?"_

_Near looked up at the girl's face and flushed. "Yes, I'm sure," he said, embarrassed. The other children snickered. "I'm at the right school. Wammy's House."_

_The girl laughed. Turning to the rest of the class, she shouted, "Well at least he knows where he is! That's something, right?"_

_The class burst into laughter and it took Near every ounce of self-control he possessed not to cry._

_**Aim!**_

_After the laughter died down, a boy pushed his way to the front of the crowd of children. "Hey Near!" He called loudly. "Why is your hair white?"_

_Near fingered a lock of his silky white hair. "I don't know," he admitted. "It's always been white."_

_The boy stared at Near. "Maybe it's covered in salt!" The children giggled and the boy grabbed a lock of Near's white hair. "Maybe we ought to shake him!" The boy cried. "You know, to get all of the salt out!"_

_**FIRE!**_

….

Near took his nose off the windowpane, realizing that it was suddenly very wet. Peering at it, he realized that the substance wetting the glass was a mixture of water and salt.

Tears. The window was wet with Near's tears. Near rubbed his face with his shirtsleeve and grabbed an airplane off the ground. He "flew" the airplane around his head, pretending to make airplane noises.

In his excitement, however, Near accidentally let go of his airplane. It "flew" across the room, landing in the doorframe. Near stared at the airplane for a moment, debating whether or not it would be worth walking over there and picking up the plane himself.

This problem was shortly resolved, however. As Near watched, a boy of about his own age picked up the airplane. The boy walked over and placed the airplane gently next to Near.

"Hi," the boy said. "You're Near, right?"

Near nodded and the boy smiled. "I thought so." The boy looked around at the mess of scattered toys. "Wow," he said appreciatively. "That's a lot of toys. I don't have many toys; I like video games better."

Near nodded again, wondering who this boy was and why he was talking to Near.

The boy stared at the toys again, then at Near. "Can I play with you?" He asked.

Near wordlessly handed him an airplane and the boy let out a gigantic smile. "Thanks!" He cried, delighted.

"I'm Near." Near said. He knew this boy already knew his name, but it seemed like the polite thing to do.

The boy stopped "flying" his airplane and stared at Near. "Hi, Near," the boy said. "I'm Matt."


	7. Thanksgiving

Why Plot Bunnies Should Go and Jump off a Bridge

By: KitKat411

**Author's Notes: So…hola again, amigos! I'm going to Florida for a week, from June 12****th**** to the 19****th****. So, there won't be any updates for SEVEN DAYS. GASP. I'll still be writing them-hopefully-so I'll have lots of updates when I get back.**

**Anyway, the long and short of it is this: I present to you as many of these short things as I can write between now-Sunday night-and Tuesday. Me hopes you'll like them. And me hopes to get a TON of reviews in the week I'm not here.**

**So…strive for one thousand reviews, okay? Haha. Just kidding. But yeah, reviews, comments, criticism, all appreciated. Gracias. **

**And so…To Prompt Ninety-Three. Another drabble. More crack! More OOCness! And more swearing! I'M ON A ROLL, PEOPLE! THREE CRACK STORIES IN A ROW! Finally! I'm learning how to shorten these stupid things.**

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Prompt Ninety-Three: Thanksgiving

**((Author's Notes: I'm don't think Thanksgiving is celebrated in Japan, but…whatever. It's a prompt; go with it.))**

What the Kira Team & Co. (Before Episode 25) is Grateful for on Thanksgiving

Ryuk

I'm grateful I dropped that Death Note into the human world. Humans sure are interesting. I like watching them interact.

Eh, who am I kidding? I'm grateful for humans because they give me apples.

Rem

I'm grateful Jealous gave his life for Misa. Now I get to follow around the hot model.

Even if she is an annoying little whore who is incapable of carrying a tune.

Matsuda

I'm grateful Light's sister has finally grown up. What a little hottie she is now!

Mogi

I'm grateful I haven't said more than one hundred words this whole year.

I'm also grateful no one has found out my secret-I'm addicted to heroin.

Light's Father

I'm grateful my son isn't Kira.

Even if he reads porn.

Light's Mother

I'm glad my son is dating that model, Misa. With all the time he spends on maintaining his looks, I thought he might be…But he's dating Misa now, so it's all okay.

Light's Sister

I'm grateful Light is good at math, because I hate school. I prefer clubbing, to be honest.

I'm also glad Matsuda does not live at my house.

Watari

I'm grateful everyone finally gets to see my face, instead of a stupid "W."

Misa

Misa-Misa is grateful Light is in love with her!

Misa-Misa is also grateful to own a Death Note, because otherwise she would have not met the love of her life!

Misa-Misa is secretly also grateful Ryuuzaki is her friend. Misa-Misa finds Ryuuzaki cute, although not as cute as Misa-Misa herself!

Light Yagami

I'm grateful Ryuuzaki is my friend. He's bright, intelligent, and easy to talk to.

When he doesn't accuse me of being Kira, that is.

Kira

I'm grateful that my plan is finally in place.

I'm grateful that damn detective is going to be dead. FUCK YOU, RYUUZAKI.

I'm glad I'm going to be the GOD of a FUCKING UTOPIA.

I'm grateful the police are stupid, idiotic morons who couldn't catch me if I stood naked in front of this building.

I'm grateful I have a Death Note.

I'm grateful I didn't write my name in the Death Note to claim it as my personal property.

L/Ryuuzaki

I'm grateful for sugar.

I'm grateful for Watari, who does everything for me.

I'm grateful that Light Yagami is my friend, even though I want to see him dead.

I'm grateful I don't have many friends, because I would probably wish them all to be dead.

I'm grateful for my baggy clothing, as I can hide extra sugar within the folds of denim.

And most of all…

I'm grateful for whoever invented eye liner. You didn't think those circles of mine were _real_, did you?


	8. Teammates

Why Plot Bunnies Should Go and Jump off a Bridge

By: KitKat411

**Author's Notes: So…hola again, amigos! I'm going to Florida for a week, from June 12****th**** to the 19****th****. So, there won't be any updates for SEVEN DAYS. GASP. I'll still be writing them-hopefully-so I'll have lots of updates when I get back.**

**Anyway, the long and short of it is this: I present to you as many of these short things as I can write between now-Sunday night-and Tuesday. Me hopes you'll like them. And me hopes to get a TON of reviews in the week I'm not here.**

**So…strive for one thousand reviews, okay? Haha. Just kidding. But yeah, reviews, comments, criticism, all appreciated. Gracias. **

**And so…To Prompt Twenty-Six. Another drabble. With swearing. I'm writing about Mello, after all. Finally! I'm learning how to shorten these stupid things.**

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Prompt Twenty-Six: Teammates

Often, children at Wammy's House were given puzzles to solve. These puzzles were always about murderers, and the children were supposed to figure out who was the killer based on very little information. Most of these puzzles were _said_ to be "faked," but the children of Wammy's House knew that some of these "puzzles" were actual cases.

And no one knew this fact better than the two "heads of school," Mello and Near. Every day, the two would sit and compete to solve these puzzles, these "games" that tested one's knowledge, logic, and reasoning ability. Often, other children would come to watch this competition. It became entertainment for the other, less-gifted students of Wammy's House. It was fun to watch Mello and Near go at it, to watch them figure out who the killer was.

Mello stared at his notes, then at the given information. This was a hard case, by far the hardest one of all. He shot a glance at Near, who was patiently waiting for Mello to solve the case.

Mello cleared his throat, certain that his theory was correct. Finally, after years of waiting, he would beat that damn white-haired snit at something. It would finally be his turn to be NUMBER ONE, to laugh, to gloat, and to point fingers at his loser companion.

Mello laid his notes on the table dramatically. "Be prepared for your downfall, Near!" He cried dramatically, aware of his audience. The other twelve-year-olds were waiting for his ultimate victory. "My conclusion is thus: _MISS SCARLET, IN THE DRAWINGROOM, WITH THE KNIFE!_"

The other children cheered loudly. Near, however, shook his head. "Actually," he said calmly, "it's Professor Plum, in the kitchen, with the rope." Near pulled the answer sheet out of its hiding place and showed Mello. "See?"

Mello stomped angrily out of the room. How the fuck was he supposed to take over the world if he couldn't even beat Near in a fucking game of _CLUE_?


	9. Fire

Why Plot Bunnies Should Go and Jump off a Bridge

By: KitKat411

**Author's Notes: HOLA, YA'LL! Haha. I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaack. I wrote this story on the plane to Florida…so…LIKE IT. Haha. Spoilers for what I think Mello's real name is…although, it's probably wrong. OC, but a minor one. I didn't think "Death Note" went deep enough into the backgrounds of Mello, Near, L, etc., so I like writing it. I especially like writing about Mello-pre leather pants, Mafia, and attitude, anyway.**

**Anyway, like it or else-just kidding-and expect an update on "To Catch a Killer" on Monday/Sunday. I'm trying to lengthen it.**

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Prompt Fifty-Two: Fire 

"Oh, Micheel, your hair is just so pretty." The speaker, a woman in her late thirties, tousled Micheel's hair affectionately. "It's so wild."

Micheel crosses his arms in front of his chest. He was five years old, possessed above average intellect, and did not appreciate being petted. "Aunt Hannah," he said grumpily, "I am not a dog."

Hannah Cassat pulled her hands away from her nephew. She stared at the small child before her. He wore an ironed shirt and jeans, shiny black shoes, and a fierce scowl.

"No, Micheel," she told him, laughing slightly, "No, you are not a dog. I suppose I'm just happy to see my favorite nephew." She took his hand and stepped into the large mansion before her. "And now that you've greeted me, may I have the pleasure of saying hello to my brother?"

"Father is in his study." Micheel said, slightly irked that Aunt Hannah wanted to talk to other people. "Mother is upstairs."

"All right, then. I'll head on over to the study and say a quick hello. Why don't you go and check on your mother, Micheel? I'm sure she'd like to see a smiling face." Hannah stopped talking and looked at the boy below her. "Or, you know, whatever face you happen to have on you." She left, leaving Micheel in the grand entranceway alone.

And so, with no one to talk to and nothing to complain about, Micheel finally went to say hello to his mother. His mother was in bed, where she had been for several weeks now. Micheel didn't know exactly what was going on, but heard words such as "anti-depressants," "suicide watch," and "going through severe mental pain" used in reference to his mother.

_It probably has to do with Father's "friends," Annabelle, Lakiesha, and Kandi, _Micheel considered. About a month ago, his mother found hotel tabs, bar flyers, and a stack of lingerie receipts. _She had yelled at Father for a long time after that_, Micheel remembered.

Yes, that was when she had started to not leave the bedroom. After that big fight.

Micheel reached the door to his mother's room. He opened the door and looked around. The shades were drawn and the light was turned off, giving the room an eerie glow. Micheel, however, ignored the scary vibe and walked over to the small lump in the bed. He sat on the corner of the bed and patted the lump. "Hello, Mother," he told it.

The lump unfurled itself slowly. A woman with blonde hair and green eyes emerged and stared at Micheel. The woman had once been very beautiful, but her once full hair was not flat and dry and her eyes, once filled with life, were now limpid and sunken in. Her face, however, visibly brightened at the sight of her son.

"Micheel!" She cried happily. "How nice to see you."

Micheel hated seeing his mother like this and he hated his father for making her like this. Still, Micheel hid his anger, frustration, and sadness. "I'm doing great, Mother," he told her instead, "really, really, great."

Micheel's mother smiled and ruffled Micheel's hair. Micheel tensed, hating the feeling, but said nothing.

"Your hair is so lovely, Micheel," she told him. "It reminds me of fire."

Micheel nodded. His mother had told him this often.

Mrs. Keehl patted her son's hair for another few minutes, smiling faintly. "Yes…fire." She fell asleep soon after, still mumbling about fire.

……………

It was a few nights later when Micheel awoke sharply. It was two-thirty in the morning and the five-year-old was confused as to why he was awake. This issue was resolved a few moments later, however, as Micheel heard the fire alarm blaring loudly.

Micheel forgot about everything in an instant. He ran out of his room, down the stairs, and outside, ignoring the engulfing smoke, the shrill alarm, and the raging inferno behind him. He concentrated solely in leaving the house behind him and emerged a few seconds later.

After regaining his breath, Micheel turned to stare behind him. He watched, immobilized, as the fire destroyed his house, his entire existence, and his parent's still-sleeping forms.

……………

It had been one week since the fire and four days since the double funeral of Mr. and Mrs. Keehl. Micheel was not seated in a taxi, staring out the window at the rainy sky outside. His Aunt Hannah sat to his left, dressed in black and fiddling with her purse. She stared out the window also, ignoring the long silence.

As Micheel watched, the taxi pulled up in front of a large, elegant, and extremely old building. "Micheel?" Hannah said softly. "Micheel, we're here. This is Wammy's House."

Micheel let Aunt Hannah lead him outside of the taxi and into the foyer of the building. He said nothing as Hannah spoke with an old man.

"So, Micheel, what do you pick?"

Micheel looked up. "What?"

Aunt Hannah looked at him. "Here at Wammy's House, none of the children use their real names. Instead, the children pick code names. This man," she pointed at the old man, "told me about it. So, which name do you want?"

Micheel rubbed his hair and thought. As he rubbed his hair, however, he remembered his mother:

_"Your hair reminds me of fire, Micheel."_

Fire. His hair reminded his mother of the very thing that eventually killed her. How ironic.

So, no, he decided, he was going to pick a name that was as far away from fire as possible. But how? What was fire? Fire was wild, unpredictable, deadly. Fire wasn't…fire wasn't…

"Mellow," he said finally. Yes, that would do nicely. No, fire was not calm. It was not mellow at all.

The old man nodded. "Mello, then." He stuck out his hand to the young child.

"Welcome to Wammy's House, Mello."


End file.
